The secret to having a favourite child
The first rule of parenting multiple children is to never admit you have a favourite child. Apparently it is not appropriate as it might cause a rift in the family or affect the other children’s self-esteem. Well there is nothing wrong with having a favourite child and you should never be afraid to let your children know exactly who the favourite is.
When a woman has her first baby, she is madly in love and the child becomes the centre of her world. This child can do no wrong and anyone who says a bad word about them, better start running fast. Her husband moves down the pecking order and so do her favourite girlfriends. Hey, she is a mum and this precious little being deserves her undivided attention. Until……
The next baby comes along. She has forgotten how beautiful a little baby is to hold and how sweet they smell. The softness of her baby’s skin against hers brings back overwhelming memories of becoming a mother.
Now she looks at her stinky toddler, constantly demanding attention and screaming if they do not get their own way. Her toddler now looks enormous compared to her baby and the size of its poop is often scary. Whenever her toddler is awake, life seems to chaotic, rarely calm like when they were a baby. Today she has a favourite child but she would never admit it out loud.
By the time baby No.3 comes along, she realises that her affections have moved, AGAIN, and the older two seem to do more wrong than right. The older children are either fighting with each, creating a mess than takes hours to get back in order or refusing to eat the healthy and delicious meals she has taken time away from her baby to prepare. Her favourite child has changed and she is starting to think she is a bad mum as her guilt settles in.
As her children grow, she becomes smarter and more efficient at this mothering job. Some days she is madly in love with her eldest child, as they seem so mature and helpful, always lending a helping hand. Other days her middle child will just sit and be with her, cuddling on couch as they watch their favourite TV shows together. And finally there are days when she watches her youngest play happily on their own, their imagination spreading its wings.
She realises she does have a favourite child and that doesn’t make her a bad mum. If she is tired, it is her eldest child she is drawn to and loves just that little bit more. If she is feeling excited then her middle child becomes the apple of her eye, always glowing in her excitement. If she is feeling grateful, humble for everything she has achieved in her life, her baby makes her heart sing.
The first rule of parenting 101 should be eliminated in the rulebook as it is good to have a favourite child and a good mother is always happy to admit it.